I am so sorry I have to say to my sweet cat Once again I really didn't mean to do that Left her sitting at the door for how long Her cries and meows just aren't very strong When I see her sitting there it breaks my heart I must come up with a plan, I need to be smart I'll think like a cat, to me what would she tell Said my cat, that's simple, just lower the door bell Author Eileen Clark 2022
I was eight years old in second grade when I began to notice the kids in my class always had the answers when called on and I never did. I remember the year was 1947 and the reason I remember that date is because I can still see it written on yellow lined paper with a black led pencil. The teacher wanted us to put the date up in the right hand corner of our paper and I never could remember the date. I stayed back in second grade and that was the beginning of the rest of my life. I won’t drag you through all of the agonizing experience I had, just the ones that are still with me. Forth or fifth grade, walking home from school I threw one of my books in the bushes because I didn’t understand my homework and would skip school the day test were given. In the summer my two brothers went outside to play after they finished the chores and I sat at the kitchen table with my mom trying to teach me math, how to tell time and spell simple words. She painted pictures on the back of big sheets of wallpaper, balloons, apples, balls, and a big clock with moving hands. I also heard often, ” Why can’t you get this stuff right like your brothers do.” The sad thing is I also looked bad, very skinny, straight brown hair, a big space in the middle of my teeth, my eyebrows grew right across my forehead meeting each other. Also I was left handed, no one but me in my class was left handed and I had one front tooth that was BLACK! It seems I fell on my face one day on the sidewalk hitting my teeth, nice. I quit school a few days after I turned sixteen, who would of guessed.
So now we’ll go to my adulthood. I never thought about it catching up on me like it did. The first time was with my kid sister. She’s still in her teens and I’m married with one child. I remember the very day, we were in the post office and I said something to her, don’t remember what it was but after she answered I felt much younger then her and way less knowledgeable. She was passing me. The second time was even worse because this time it was my teenage daughter. We were in the yard at our home in Texas and after I got done telling her something she kindly corrected me, very scary. And then the worst of the worst, I wrote a nice letter to my granddaughter who’s about ten or twelve and a week later I see my letter on her dresser in her bedroom with corrections made on my spelling. Still I did pretty good bluffing my way through life. I had many good jobs, wrapping meat in the supermarkets, working in the insurance company, worked at a double wide factory hanging the curtains in all the rooms, cleaning, staining, trimming, and final inspection. At forty I got my GED, ya ! I got a job at a workshop as a therapeutic technician working with adults that had retardation issues, or as the correct way of saying today is ( special needs ). I remember one day saying to a co-worker and good friend, they don’t know things like I don’t know things, the difference is, they don’t know that they don’t know things, I know that I don’t know things, that I’m stupid!
I’m a Jehovah’s Witness and when I received one of our Awake magazine, on the cover was written, Does Your Child Have Learning Problems? I still have that magazine, May, 1983. I read it and then I went to our library and got several books on learning disability’s. As I read them I cried, it was me, everything I was reading was about me. My mom was telling me on the phone one day that my dad shuts down when he gets nervous or if someone is giving him directions to some place, so I guess that tells you who I got it from. I can’t read road maps, can’t drive far from home, can’t follow directions when to many are given, and get lost in big buildings. We with poor learning skills tend to shut down, became great con artist in that we have ways of squeezing out of tough situations if we’re called upon. We do much better with visual information then reading stuff. Now that I’ve read all this important information in these books I got, it’s answered so many things I had wondered about. I was an intelligent person, much more then many other people that I know so how can this be. Why did I have so much trouble learning something when so many others didn’t? Well now I know and I’m not afraid to admit it, no more shame. The bright side of all of this is people like myself are very creative and artistic and that I am! I paint, (watercolors), build things, water gardens, arbers, landscaping went to interior decorator classes, and write poems.
P.S. My writings I can spell check but I have not found a site that will help me know where to put commas so go easy on me please.
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You know the old saying your goose is cooked Whenever I hear that I really get shooked I hear there's some truth to that nasty old saying I'm valuable because of the many eggs I keep laying You have to learn how to run really fast If you don't, how long will your life last I've learned to do more then just waddle You'd be smart to use me as a role model Don't get caught walking around here alone The inside of a kettle will be your next home Keep your bill shut, don't utter a honk or quack If you get noticed it may be your last act Author Eileen Clark
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The September days can get very hot Turn on the air conditioner, then it's not By late afternoon you are cold again Turn off the air and let evening set it The very next day you wake up to a chill Is that really frost on your windowsill Get out the sweaters and turn up the heat The days to come this activity we'll repeat We are just now entering the first of November Much talk of a heat wave, so try to remember Weather change happens so don't lose your cool Predicting the weather makes a smart man a fool Author Eileen Clark
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What did I do to you now, did I do something wrong I'm going to get through this and try to be strong I had a feeling this was coming, expected the worst I tried to be prepared, all my words so well rehearsed To my complete surprise the rejection came in a letter This persons is a coward, I thought I knew them better I'm not getting a chance to ask the hundred questions Many friends are overloading me with their suggestions I thought foolishly that you were really mine That you felt the same and we were totally fine I read further down and realized I'm the real fool That you believe dating others is absolutely cool Seems I'm the only one that's experiencing a broken heart Looks like I'm proving to be a person not very smart Moving on with my life, these sad feelings I can shake Accepting the fact that this was indeed my big mistake Author Eileen Clark
The big old gray owl, how wise he can be, Hiding from hunters that will never see. Sitting in plain sight on a branch of a tree, Blending with the bark will keep him free. When night slips in and the darkness takes hold, You can be sure that slick owl will get very bold. The depth of his sound reaches beneath every root, Filling chilled air with that mysterious familiar hoot. Other then his big round eyes of a bright yellow, The quick turning of his head, what a smart fellow. Many claims are made that the owl is very wise, There can be no doubt for look at that disguise. Author Eileen Clark 2022
Beautiful Photo taken by @edseljamesbatuigas
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